Women Who Pay For Sex

By Matty Silver, Sex Therapist on September 16, 2015 in Other

We tend to think that only men are willing to pay for sex, but in the past decade more and more women have been looking for sexual experiences and are willing to pay for them.

It is easier and more convenient than going to clubs or bars. Often the women don’t want to be found out; they want it to be private and kept a secret.

Some career women with high disposable incomes are just too busy for relationships. Others who have had a break-up or painful divorce find it easier to have sex without strings attached.

The thought of trying to date again and meet somebody new is just too difficult for many – but they miss sex. They may want a sexual massage, just to be touched or be intimate with someone.

One of my clients told me she answered an advertisement in the local paper from ‘James’, who offered erotic massages.

She was very lonely after a relationship break-up; she was tired, had gained weight and lost all her confidence.

She didn’t really know what to expect, but was pleasantly surprised. James is a massage therapist who found some women were desperate to have an erotic massage leading to an orgasm, in a place where they could talk and feel comfortable. He also offers more if a client asks for it.

My client saw him for months and ended up having sex with him. He was wonderful, she said. He gave her back her confidence and she gained more knowledge about her body.

She came to see me because she wanted to tell somebody. Deep down, she felt a bit guilty and certainly would not have confided in her girlfriends. In the meantime, she found a new love interest.

Several agencies and private escorts cater entirely for women; this type of service gives women options and choices with a professional in a discreet environment.

It is not only single women who are looking for male escorts, but also those who are married or in a relationship.

Some women who have an almost sexless marriage will not leave their husbands or partners because their relationships are not that bad, and they may have children or are financially unable to leave.

Others simply want an exciting experience in a safe environment. Some women with a disability may choose to pay for sex when they find it difficult to find a partner. Others just need a ‘date’ if they have to go to an important work dinner or a wedding and do not want to go on their own.

However, society still finds the idea of women paying for sex quite unacceptable. On the other hand, going to a bar, getting drunk and going home with a complete stranger and possibly having unsafe sex is considered okay.

It is not a secret that some men pay for sex, always have and probably always will. So why is paying for sex such a stigma for women?