Fat’s Where It’s At

By Pearl Bullivant on July 28, 2011 in Other

Dear Pearl – Fat people RULE! – Kev, Clovelly.

Dear Kev – Fat people may rule, but not in the Eastern Suburbs because Pearl isn’t seeing it on the streets. With the exception of Pearl’s ex-husband (last seen in Paddington wearing a tight red t-shirt stretched over his chubby torso) and the odd flabby man jogging in Speedos, fat is not a word I’d use to describe the fashion-forward East.

How can fat possibly compete in a world where botox shots are more prevalent than childhood immunisation and where looking like a social x-ray is the latest ‘must have’ amongst the 4WDing, gym-obsessed Yummy Mummy set? This obsession with thinness is so perverse I’ve been told that women compete over the size of their baby bump at pregnancy pilates classes and healthy girls as young as six are being labelled as ‘fat’ by their more glamorous peers.

And the skinny obsession isn’t just for women. If I overhear another skinny, male, fluoro-clad cyclist pretentiously raving on about losing weight for the ironman triathlon I’m going to push him off his bike!

But all is not lost, Kev. Fat people will be ruling the Eastern Suburbs one day if the children of the Yummy Mummy set are anything to go by. Actually, I’d give it fifteen years given what I’m seeing in the supermarkets, cafes and parks. Yummy Mummies may be slim and glamorous young things who live off the sniff of a soy decaf latte, but have you seen what their children are chomping into at 9am? Junk food. Go into any park at 9am and you won’t see toddlers eating cheese sandwiches, fruit or arrowroot biscuits. Instead, you will see them gorging on crisps, Tiny Teddies, chocolate bars and ’Chicken In A Biskit’ (full of every chemical known to man), whilst sucking on warm juice and flavoured milk – oh, such wonderful treats provided by mothers who demand nothing less than $12–a-loaf gourmet breads, unpasteurised milk and free-range, gluten/lactose-free everything!

The consumption of junk food is anywhere, anytime because the over-indulged children of the affluent generation can’t be expected to go without sustenance for any length of time – crisps immediately before swimming lessons, donuts instead of oranges post soccer match, Twisties whilst sitting in a shopping trolley. We live in an area where mothers who are actively starving themselves in the name of fashion are feeding their children to obesity!

The irony is that this generation of parent frequently informs us how educated, creative and affluent they are compared to the generations before. This is the generation that takes pregnancy very seriously, and insists on breastfeeding, cloth nappies, designer nurseries and baby clothing, organic baby food, and luxurious prams and 4WDs to cart the kiddies around in. It’s a generation fully informed on parenting, with a plethora of parenting books, magazines and websites at their disposal. But despite these information sources telling the highly educated parents not to give their children juice or processed food, they elect to ignore the message and instead blame junk food advertising and ‘peer group pressure’. They even have the hide to claim that they are misinformed about the healthiness of food. Any fool can see that eating chocolate for breakfast is unhealthy!

So Kev, take some joy in the fact that in fifteen years time ‘fat will be where it’s at’ in the Eastern Suburbs. Woollahra will no longer be full of tanned, botoxed, social x-rays. Instead, Queen Street will be lined with fast food stores and plus-sized clothing boutiques. That childhood habit of eating chocolate at 9am isn’t going to be discarded just because one hits adulthood.

Love skinny Pearl….