Big Barry’s Acts Of Benevolence

By Pearl Bullivant on March 12, 2014 in Other

March 28, 2014 marks Barry O’Farrell’s third year as Premier of New South Wales, and with only twelve months until the next state election it is never too early to review the legacy of his government. Some unkind people will label Barry’s premiership a ‘regime’, but like all modern benevolent rulers Barry can never be accused of not looking after the interests and safety of his citizens.

Under Barry’s reign, his skill and adeptness at destroying anything reeking of environmental or heritage protection has meant that my liberties are safe from the NIMBYs and greenies who are determined to interfere with my freedom to fish, mine and raze trees for vile developments. Abolishing the Department of Environment was an absolute win for Barry’s financial backers, but where his reforms have really succeeded in making me feel totally safe and secure (and ready to re-elect him as leader) are in the areas of National Parks, road transport, fracking and night time loitering.

Barry’s first act of benevolence was an attempt to open National Parks to recreational shooters. As a bushwalker, my safety was guaranteed in the knowledge that only one in four bushwalkers are at risk of being accidently shot, and that those lovely shooters would be wearing hi-viz gear readily available from any Big W store on the wrong side of Anzac Parade. What a sad day it was for the Shooters Party when a senior member of the Game Council stuffed up Barry’s benevolent offer by cruelly slaughtering goats, leaving National Parks free to be enjoyed by the people who actually appreciate them.

Barry’s second act of benevolence had a personal ring to it after I nearly collided with a B-double truck that sped through a red light on King Georges Road in its haste to get to Melbourne. Imagine my absolute joy when Barry felt a duty to help out the transport industry by allowing B-triple trucks on high activity routes following a trial period. As we all know, the transport industry won’t invest in B-triples unless the ‘reforms’ are a cert, and I’m heartened that Barry has overlooked a recent report that found 80 percent of long haul truck drivers suffer from fatigue on the road. And let’s not forget that Barry did make a personal appeal to Coles and Woolworths to stop putting pressure on drivers after their trucks were involved in a spate of fatalities – terribly reassuring.

Barry’s third act of benevolence was one we can all share in: the gift of fracked gas to China. We can all rest easy knowing that recent CSG ‘reforms’ will mean that 96.6% of farming land and environmentally sensitive areas can, one day, be turned into gas fields, striking what the Government calls “the right balance for communities and industry” – an industry which is pushing the line that “unconventional gas will ultimately be beneficial for the nation’s progress”. Wonderful to know that ‘progress’ is represented by poisoned water and toxic agriculture.

Barry’s final act of benevolence had to be his swift reaction to recent acts of alcohol-fueled violence outside licensed premises. Initially putting his faith in a self-regulating AHA (an organisation adamant that their product has no bearing on one-punch incidents), Barry refused to call an alcohol summit, instead blaming parents and the community. Such was his faith in the AHA that I was surprised Barry didn’t introduce legislation to prevent the victims’ families from taking civil action against the organisation. Barry did finally come through with trading restrictions and mandatory sentencing, but with his cuts to the paramedic service I am feeling ever so street smart.

Pearl xx