I Still Call Qantas My Favourite Airline

By Rupert Truscott-Hughes on April 17, 2014 in Other

We really do hate a tall poppy here in Australia. We’re always very quick to bag anyone or anything that isn’t performing to our high levels of expectation, whether it be a sporting team like the Wallabies, a sportsman like Michael Clark or an under siege national airline like Qantas.

When it comes to Qantas, Rupert here is not going to jump on the hate bandwagon, even though I stand to lose an incredibly large number of frequent flyer points if things really do go to shit.

I can’t really pinpoint the reason why, but there’s just something I like about flying Qantas. I like hearing an Australian accent on a plane, especially on my journey home. I like the fact that the hosties share the same sense of humour as me. I like that I can get an Australian beer or a nice red from the Yarra Valley. I like that the pilots can pronounce the names of our cities when they make their mid-flight announcements. I even like the content on the entertainment systems more than on most other airlines.

I also like the fact that the staff are paid reasonably well (maybe a little too well thanks to an over-zealous union movement) and that they’re perfectly accommodating but at the same time they don’t take any shit.

Yet, when you look around at the reviews on the Internet or check out the online rankings to see which airline is considered the ‘best’, Qantas generally doesn’t fair too well.

In the most recent World Airline Awards, our national airline only just squeezed into the top 10, while the year prior we were languishing back in 15th, behind not only Virgin Australia but also Garuda Indonesia and Malaysia Airlines (do you see where I’m going here?).

In my most humble of opinions, at the end of the day the best thing about flying Qantas is the fact that you can be fairly confident that the plane you’re flying in most probably won’t fall out of the sky. Let’s not forget that air travel is an absolute miracle, and I’m not really a believer in miracles. Every time I leave the ground on one of these buses of the sky I am relieved to land safely, and I’ll take a good safety record over an extra inch of leg room and a hostie’s saccharine smile any day.

In terms of all things political, should the government be bailing Qantas out with a $3 billion unsecured loan? Shit no, but Australians should not be laying all the blame on Alan Joyce for the airline’s woes. The unions are not happy with Joyce’s decision to slash 5000 jobs, but at least he has started the purge by showing a number of senior managers the door first. Obviously the flying kangaroo also rots from the head. Regardless, it’s hard not to attribute a large portion of the blame to the unions in the first place. They made their own bed, pissed in it and now they must wallow in its saturated sheets until the sun comes up.

Joyce has copped a lot of flack during his rein at Qantas, a large portion of it due to his Irish heritage. If the top dog was an Aussie I doubt the media would have been so hard on him (or her).

That said, as long as Qantas keeps its planes in the air, I for one will continue to support it. It’s time for us Aussies to show a bit of patriotism by giving our patronage to the national airline. With the spirit of Australia and the luck of the Irish on our side, we can’t go wrong.