Here’s To Jon Jon

By Elizabeth Major on June 6, 2014 in Other

I can’t stop thinking about how it happened. I can’t remember if it was cold at 2am on Wednesday, April 30, or if it was raining. I don’t know why these thoughts even matter, but it’s some kind of mental game we play with ourselves when confronted with loss. The ‘what ifs’ and the ‘maybes’ that serve no purpose still flood our minds because they are part of the process of grief.

I met Chris when we worked at the Palace together. I remember talking to him behind the bar as he worked harder than any other person in there, picking up glasses and cleaning filthy ashtrays. I have never known anyone else who could do all of that and still smile like the world was a beautiful place.

“They call me Jon Jon,” he said. I can’t remember if I ever asked why. Obviously it made perfect sense to call him Rhodesy or just Chris, but Jon Jon suited him.

When I saw his face appear in a few different profile pictures on Facebook, I wanted to write him a message to ask why he was suddenly so popular. I opened his page and saw the ‘get better’ messages. I was still confused. I thought maybe he broke a leg or something. Then I found the link to the news article and I was glad for Facebook. I was glad for the filter that it provided and I wondered how many people had to find out from the news that our friend had been involved in an accident and was in a critical condition.

Perhaps he can’t read all the heart-felt messages or see the collection of pictures that are being posted and we are all just doing it for each other. Facebook might not be a direct line to heaven but it’s cathartic to think that we can still send a message out to the digital memory of our friend. In the same way that people leave notes on the graves of loved ones, our technological age has provided us with an ethereal platform to share our loss, to share memories with strangers and to say one final goodbye.

I wanted to contribute to the picture collage of his life that was being uploaded, but I only had one photo. I can’t remember who took the picture. It was taken in my backyard over New Year’s Eve in 2007. We had been awake for three days straight, working for at least two of them, and five of us lay on the grass in the hot sun. I remember this being one of the best times of my life, but I can’t remember why. That day I had yelled at Jon Jon. I don’t know why but suddenly I had enough of being called ‘babe’. I yelled at him until tears ran down his face. I don’t remember what happened next but this photo was taken shortly after. Whatever I had said, he had forgiven me because he was just that kind of person.

When someone passes it is easy to sing their praises, but when it comes to Chris, every word is the honest truth. The world could not have lost a better person. He really was that generous and caring guy who was always there for you. He was always smiling, always happy to see you.

Maybe he really was an angel who did what he came here to do and then had to get back to the boss man in heaven. Or maybe the beer is just colder in heaven. The emptiness of his loss will be filled with the love for life that we know he had. The lives he touched in his short time with us will forever be grateful to have known someone so pure.

I’m sorry I made you cry, Chris. You definitely got me back now. In loving memory of Christopher ‘Jon Jon’ Rhodes.