The Unreliable Guide is going on a long-haul flight soon and we are already having nightmares about it. Quite apart from the fact it’s unnatural and you might plummet from the sky like a stone, flying is claustrophobic...

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Pearl is not normally swayed by the evils of advertising, but I will admit to one guilty pleasure that would warm the cockles of a marketer’s heart: junk mail. You won’t find a “No Junk Mail” sign on my letter bo...

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Taurus Apr 21-May 21 No one gives a f*ck which school you went to; all that matters is how much money your parents have. Gemini May 22-Jun 21 Someone, somewhere, is hatching an elaborate scheme to separate you from your ...

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With winter fast approaching it’s time for seasonal lifestyle tips from Pearl. I’m tempted to launch into a ‘toughen up princess’ rant, directed at all those who dare to don North Face puffer jackets and knee-hig...

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Aries Mar 21-Apr 20 The best long-term plan is to have as much fun as possible in the short-term so you have plenty of happy memories. Taurus Apr 21-May 21 Big challenges lie ahead but you’re ready for them and you’l...

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The insatiable demand for outstanding child minding facilities among Eastern Suburbs parents has prompted the conversion of the University of New South Wales into the world’s largest elite child care centre. The transf...

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The decision to designate northern Clovelly Beach as the world’s first underage beach has been declared such a huge success that the initiative will be continued during the 2019/20 summer school holidays. Millions of c...

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January 26, 2019 marks the final Australia Day celebration in the Eastern Suburbs after community organisations successfully lobbied for the region to secede from the Commonwealth of Australia. The Union Jack and Souther...

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Conservative elements within the federal government have successfully lobbied to arm lifeguards on all Eastern Suburbs beaches with semi-automatic weapons. The politicians behind the push are praising the initiative, whi...

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The enormous success of On Demand public transport services to the Eastern Suburbs has prompted the NSW Government to extend On Demand services to other spheres of life. Local residents will soon be blessed with On Deman...

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